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A hard decision

Hi,

As usual, when suddenly I come here to write things down meaning I wanted to pour something out of my heart.

A hard decision. Yes it is. 2020 is a new start but also the end of my first career.. yes, I quick from the job.. a job once was my dream.. an engineer which is my field of study.

Almost a year I find it tough to stand it... Work pressure, bully, insufficient training, being blame.. 98% independent. No one give a sufficient guidance,,a wise manager who I looked up to being terminated in 24h notice. Till then, I've stop learning... Nobody competent enough to guide me (us) as a young engineer. At first, I thought I am a troublesome, so slow not picking up fast...

But,, after sometimes I realized I hv done more than enough. The company never give enough input (training,, necessary skills..) and expect me (us) to come out with the outstanding output. It so good enough we are able to perform the job accordingly/satisfactorily.

As a young engineer or a middle position, I feel the burden..I hv top who always give instructions but at the same time, my subordinates are people who have low IQ level. Though the position should be filled in by at least a diploma holder, this company doesn't care as long as they can pay low and the people can do 'work'. Yes, do work without put any brain.. when this happens, it's a burden for me (us). This top expect more from me (us) who has qualification so I can't say "don't know". It is a forbidden excuse.

It is totally a double work!! Also as a middle position with qualifications, these irresponsible employer will take advantage  by asking me (us) to take up more tasks. Since the turn over rate at the company is so high,, there's a lot of vacant positions which play a big role in the company. Such as production SV, document controller, quality inspector etc..

Again,,, taking up more tasks as they said meaning to take up other position job scopes!! The norm of the company is,once you hv tried to cover some part of the roles, meaning you are responsible for the rest of the roles. The idea is, the more you do, the more blames they'll put on you.

Am I stupid enough to let myself being victimised? And the fact is, they pay me low wages. There's no guarantee I do more I can earn more. In fact, if got hiccup anywhere as I am overloaded, they threaten you with "no bonus". Is it fair??

I think I bare it long enough until I decided  to tender the resignation letter. I don't feel anything.. only to escape from the crazy workplace. More worst when the bully started to disturb me emotionally and harm my health condition.

My healthy is my right, I don't gamble it for the useless job. That makes me wanna quick firmly. I tell everyone close to me and get their advices. Alhamdulillah, the decision is supported by all especially my husband. He hurts seeing my emotion declining everyday. I don't talk but sleep a lot because I am not happy.

Not lucky enough because my first job is not as good as others.. however, I take it as a challenge and put the most trust on Allah S.W.T. I pray and He gives the answer. Thank you Allah, you choose me to go through this part of life. And I am sure something good is awaiting. At the moment, I'll put 💯 focus on my health as I'm carrying another soul in mine.

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